Relationship...

in ur lifetime, ur a part of many relationships.. whether it's with ur mom, dad, siblings, cousins, friends or that significant other. for every relationship to be successful, both sides have to compromise a little... but what happens when only 1 side is expected to compromise and not the other?

i guess this is how people become very distant from each other .. or their relationships just end slowly. expecting a lot from one side and nothing from the other just seems so .. unfair. but then again, people do say.. life is unfair! but why do relationships have to be unfair? when u love some1, why can't u give them something back while ur expectations are so great. why can't the RULES for the relationships be fair for both sides? if one has to compromise, the other should do it too.. ritee? ok so mayb this won't work in every relationship.. cuz every relationship is different. ur relationships with ur parents would b different from ur relationship with ur siblings.. both require love but they both have a different set of rules.

what im talkin about is the relationship with that significant other... the special person.. the loved one.. that totally-handsome-tall-dark-dude from the romantic comedies that girls dream of.. that knight in the shinning armor... the one who would treat u like ur all they see and no1 else. these kinds of relationships require some compromise, some understanding and most of all, TRUST!

rules for both side should b the same.. and one shouldn't expect too much from the other. my understanding of these kinds of relationships isn't so vast but i do know that without some expectations, same rules, compromise, understanding and trust .. these relationships tend to not last very long.

oh another thing, some people in relationships tend to be VERY controlling.. which obviously isn't a good thing, cuz its like.. we have a life of our own, yes ur a part of it, yes we love u, but we do have a brain and we do know how to use it. we have our own choices to make which we can make all by ourselves.. u can give us ur opinion on things but u can't control every single day of our life!

ok so lets not 4get the good side. he does love u, he is there when u need him, he is an important part of ur life and u do love him a lot. he gives u his time, he cares for u a lot. lends his shoulder when u need it, yes he does have ego problems but he does eventually get over it. he wipes ur tears, hugs u when u need it, tells u ur beautiful when ur a mess and he does appreciate that ur a part of his life.

so in my understanding, every relationship is unique in its own way.. yes, they all have tiny problems but then u do get tremendous amount of love in return [hopefully]... well, through my observation, in the end i do come to a conclusion which goes something like this ..

can't live with them, can't live without them!

Dreams.......

I look around me…

There’s a man who never had a dream, circumstances made him look like a beggar and not a chooser, he took up what came his way, made it his dream to succeed in it and he did. He says he’s happy today!

Then there’s this girl, who wanted to be a doctor, parents, money, luck- pushed her into software, she smelled green ink, n stayed there!! I think she’s happy…she looks like that!!

There’s another one who wanted to teach French but got married and the dream was lost!! I can’t say if she’s happy, I never had d courage to ask!!

Another one left a high paying job to pursue his dream, he found success as well. I am sure he’s happy, I don’t need to ask!

There’s also, a man who has all d prestigious degrees in the country. But his marriage fell apart after 20 long years and two kids. Is there any meaning to his success?? I wonder what his dream really was!

And then there’s a girl who realized she never really wanted what she dreamt of all this while after having worked hard enough to make it true!

There are so many of them around me, most of them happy with what they have. Some think they couldn’t have gotten any better, the others just tell themselves they could have been worse and they should rather be thankful than crib!

Its amazing how so many of them never really had a dream!! And those who did, compromised on them for comforts! A handful of them fought only to realize later this isn’t what they really wanted. Some of them are still fighting, the rest are searching for new dreams.

I’m thinking, what are dreams for?? To fall back on when nothing else falls in place or to make sure they come true??

May be dreams are there to tell us that happiness is a choice we make, it doesn’t come as a result of certain dreams which come true, but with a decision, which we take to make sure we live well.

m back :))

finally ...after so many months m back to blogging :)..its been so long i havent written anything...now am realizing its always best to give words to your thoughts